X Factor Live Shows Week 2 Review
First up is Nu Vibe, with a performance of U2's With or Without You. Once again they're bloody awful. Tulisa attempts to convince us and herself that the performance was somehow "decent", but Louis and Gary have got it spot on, No Vibe is absolutely right. 2/10. Which is generous to say the least.
Onto Sami Brookes, with Dolly Parton's I Will Always Love You. After her decent performance last week, it's back to shockingly bad again. Better than No Vibe though. Slightly. 3/10.
Craig now, with Beyonce's Best Thing I Never Had. Unfortunately it's nowhere near as good as last week's performance. Best so far, but SO disappointing. 4/10.
Oh, God, it's the 6 year old Janet Devlin again. Straight away she's offending my ears with her awful tunelessness. It's Elvis Presley's Can't Help Falling In Love. All of a sudden, Nu Vibe are safe again by a long chalk. Godawful. 0/10.
As hard as it can be to follow up with something worse, here's Frankie. We actually listened to a couple of words before realising it was SO awful, especially with a song that means so much to my better half, that we basically had to skip over it. -100/10.
Jonny now. I'm amazed. I actually enjoyed that. And I don't even like the song, which is Kylie's Can't Get You Out Of My Head. So far, he's quite possibly the best act I've seen. I really can't believe I'm saying that, because I've never taken Jonny seriously, comparing him to last year's Wagner. But I did NOT see that coming. Good work Jonny, 6/10.
Marcus now, with Rihanna's Russian Roulette. This has actually got to be the worst X Factor ever. This is terrible. 4/10.
Rhythmix up next, and once again my ears are offended. Which idiot was it that suggested this might be the best girl group ever on X Factor? Worst, maybe... Louis sums it up when he describes them as "fun". Didn't he describe Wagner as fun last year? 0/10.
Misha B, reminding me of Grace Jones comes out, with Charles and Eddie's Would I Lie to You. It's not amazing, but so far... she's up there with Jonny. 6/10.
Whilst I'm seriously thinking of ditching X Factor altogether now, here's The Risk with Bruno Mars' Just The Way You Are. It starts off very badly, but as soon as we hit the chorus, it's actually REALLY good. I enjoyed that a lot. If it wasn't for the start, I'd have give them the highest mark so far. But they'll have to settle for another 6/10.
Sophie on stage now, with The Calling's Wherever You Will Go. The first Chorus is good, but everything else is pure tuneless. 2/10.
Kitty to finish, with Bjork's It's Oh So Quiet. Well, based on singing ability, she was far from the worst, but she wasn't anywhere near the best either. 4/10.
To sum up quickly, then... X Factor is in BIG trouble. A true lack of quality, throughout, no-one really blowing me away, but Frankie and Janet have GOT to be in the bottom 2. And either of them can go, I really don't care.
Onto Sami Brookes, with Dolly Parton's I Will Always Love You. After her decent performance last week, it's back to shockingly bad again. Better than No Vibe though. Slightly. 3/10.
Craig now, with Beyonce's Best Thing I Never Had. Unfortunately it's nowhere near as good as last week's performance. Best so far, but SO disappointing. 4/10.
Oh, God, it's the 6 year old Janet Devlin again. Straight away she's offending my ears with her awful tunelessness. It's Elvis Presley's Can't Help Falling In Love. All of a sudden, Nu Vibe are safe again by a long chalk. Godawful. 0/10.
As hard as it can be to follow up with something worse, here's Frankie. We actually listened to a couple of words before realising it was SO awful, especially with a song that means so much to my better half, that we basically had to skip over it. -100/10.
Jonny now. I'm amazed. I actually enjoyed that. And I don't even like the song, which is Kylie's Can't Get You Out Of My Head. So far, he's quite possibly the best act I've seen. I really can't believe I'm saying that, because I've never taken Jonny seriously, comparing him to last year's Wagner. But I did NOT see that coming. Good work Jonny, 6/10.
Marcus now, with Rihanna's Russian Roulette. This has actually got to be the worst X Factor ever. This is terrible. 4/10.
Rhythmix up next, and once again my ears are offended. Which idiot was it that suggested this might be the best girl group ever on X Factor? Worst, maybe... Louis sums it up when he describes them as "fun". Didn't he describe Wagner as fun last year? 0/10.
Misha B, reminding me of Grace Jones comes out, with Charles and Eddie's Would I Lie to You. It's not amazing, but so far... she's up there with Jonny. 6/10.
Whilst I'm seriously thinking of ditching X Factor altogether now, here's The Risk with Bruno Mars' Just The Way You Are. It starts off very badly, but as soon as we hit the chorus, it's actually REALLY good. I enjoyed that a lot. If it wasn't for the start, I'd have give them the highest mark so far. But they'll have to settle for another 6/10.
Sophie on stage now, with The Calling's Wherever You Will Go. The first Chorus is good, but everything else is pure tuneless. 2/10.
Kitty to finish, with Bjork's It's Oh So Quiet. Well, based on singing ability, she was far from the worst, but she wasn't anywhere near the best either. 4/10.
To sum up quickly, then... X Factor is in BIG trouble. A true lack of quality, throughout, no-one really blowing me away, but Frankie and Janet have GOT to be in the bottom 2. And either of them can go, I really don't care.
posted by Fishsta at 3:13 am
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